


Search Your Feelings

by tablelamp



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Afterlife, Angst, Force Ghosts, Gen, Hope, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Regrets Han's had a few, Snark, Star Wars: The Force Awakens Spoilers, Star Wars: The Last Jedi Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-05-15 07:03:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14785739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tablelamp/pseuds/tablelamp
Summary: Han had never seen a ghost, so when he woke to find himself glowing faintly, he had no idea what was going on.





	Search Your Feelings

Han had never seen a ghost, so when he woke to find himself glowing faintly, he had no idea what was going on.

_Okay_ , he told himself. _Think back. What do you remember? What’s the last thing?_

Ben. He remembered Ben asking for his help. Then sudden sharp heat slicing through him—the lightsaber. Han looked down at his abdomen, but there was no wound, no pain. Could he have recovered? He knew Luke had received a mechanical hand once, but he didn’t know if that could be done with someone’s stomach.

“Han.”

Han knew that voice. He lifted his head to see Luke...not young, boyish Luke, the way Han had once known him, but older Luke, bearded and full of gravitas.

“Hey, kid,” Han said with a grin, unable to let go of the ‘older brother’ role even though it probably didn’t fit either of them anymore. “They found you, huh?”

Luke smiled. “Yeah, they found me.”

Han nodded, not sure what else to say. It had been a long time. “Good.”

Luke chuckled, and it was a rusty sound Han had never heard before. “You don’t know where we are, do you?”

Han looked around, but there didn’t seem to be much to speak of; it was dark, and he couldn’t see very well beyond the two of them. “Nope. I like the, uh, lighting, though.” He gestured to Luke’s glow and then to his own.

“We’re part of the Force now,” Luke said, gesturing around them.

Han laughed. “Sure we are. Where’s Chewie?”

Luke shook his head. “He’s still alive.”

“I know he’s _alive_. I--” Han stopped short when he realized what Luke was saying. He remembered the lightsaber wound...and if he didn’t remember healing from it, maybe that meant he hadn’t. “I’m not?”

Luke sighed, expression sympathetic. “I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault. You didn’t stab me.” Han sighed. “Dammit.”

Luke rested a hand on his shoulder. “It’s difficult, I know.”

Han pulled away from the touch. “Wait. If I’m dead, how is any of this happening? How am I here?”

“People who are strong in the Force can survive their death,” Luke said.

A snort escaped Han. “I don’t even believe in the Force, pal.” Not in relation to himself, anyway.

Luke shrugged blithely. “I guess that doesn’t matter.”

Han was used to difficult situations, but this was beyond anything he’d ever dealt with, and definitely beyond anything he’d ever planned for. “So...what? You can see me because you’re a Jedi?” He could see Luke’s hesitation. “What?”

“I can see you because I’m here with you.”

“But you’re still alive,” Han said, knowing the moment the words were out of his mouth that Luke was going to deny it.

Luke looked wistful. “Not anymore.”

Han felt a surge of anger. “So he won. Ben...whatever he’s calling himself now...he won?”

“No. He didn’t. Rey and all the rest of the rebels are still fighting.”

Han sighed. “I thought we’d made it so they wouldn’t have to.”

Luke nodded. “I think we all thought so.”

Those poor kids...left to clean up the mess he’d left behind. He hadn’t even kept his promise to bring Ben home. After Darth Vader had died and the Empire had been defeated, he’d felt like a hero, but if Han was being honest with himself, he hadn’t been one since.

“So what do I do now? Have lunch with other dead people? No, of course not. We’re dead; we probably don’t eat.” Han couldn’t prevent his sarcasm from showing through. “What’s the point of all this?”

Luke looked startled by Han’s outburst. “You can talk to other people if you want to. The more time we spend here, the more in tune we are with the Force.”

“Just what I always wanted.”

“You don’t know how useful that can be. You can feel what’s going on all over the galaxy. You can even contact people who are still alive and Force-sensitive.”

That ruled out Chewie and Lando. He might be able to get in touch with Rey, but he hadn’t known her very long. She’d have no reason to want to see him. And Ben...he’d chosen his own path. Han wasn’t going to try to interfere with it again. “Nobody there wants to talk to me.”

“I can think of someone.” The iron in Luke’s voice surprised Han, but...oh.

“Does she have the Force? I mean, can she feel...” Han gestured in frustration. “I dunno how you guys talk about this stuff. Could she see me?”

“Yeah,” Luke said. “She could.”

But if he could see her, what could he say? Sorry for running off and leaving you to deal with everything? Sorry for all that time we didn’t have together? Oh, yeah, and let’s not forget sorry for not only not bringing our son home but for trusting him enough to be murdered by him.

“I don’t think she’ll want to talk,” Han said, turning away from Luke.

“It’s your decision.” But Luke sounded disappointed.

Han hesitated. “You two were always close. Can you...tell how she is?”

“Strong,” Luke said. “Determined. Ferociously protective of the people around her.”

Han smiled in spite of himself. “Sounds like her.”

“But she’s grieving,” Luke said. “She doesn’t show it, but...she’s lost a lot of people she cared about, and she felt all of us go.”

“Felt us go? What does that mean?” Han turned to face Luke.

“If you’re connected to the Force, you feel when someone you love dies,” Luke said. “You, me, Holdo...she felt us all leave her.”

That sounded horrifying. That _was_ horrifying. “I didn’t know that.”

“We don’t really like to think about it,” Luke said. He paused. “If you want...I can teach you to sense her through the Force. Once you learn to do that, you’ll have everything you need to talk to her. If you want to.”

All this was way too metaphysical for Han; he liked things he could see and touch. Using some weird energy system to somehow sense Leia’s feelings and see how she was felt like it shouldn’t be possible at all. But at the same time, Han was dead, and yet somehow he was here. Maybe he shouldn’t talk to her, but at least he could see how she was every once in a while...maybe even let her know she wasn’t alone. There had to be some subtle way of doing that without letting her know it was him doing it, right?

“Two things,” Han said.

Luke raised his eyebrows. “Okay.”

“First, I’m not gonna call you Master Luke,” Han said.

Luke’s mouth quirked up at the corners. “I think I can live with that.”

“Second, can we please not talk about the Force? Or can we call it something else? Every time you mention it, I feel like I’m falling for a con.”

“We can call it whatever you want. That doesn’t change what it is.”

“No, but it makes me feel less stupid. Deal?”

Luke shrugged. “Deal.”

Han nodded in satisfaction. “When can we start?”


End file.
